Feel Those What-Do-You-Call-Its

As you know, October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. (Should month be capitalized? I’ve seen this both ways.) (Heh. Month goes both ways.)

Ahem. Grow up. Where were we?

Oh yeah, I was saying, it’s almost Feel Your Boobies Month. (And if you don’t have any, then for God’s sake, feel someone else’s.) Cheri did a post yesterday and also followed up with an email reminding me to schedule my smash-o-gram, so I called right away and was able to get in there this morning due to a cancellation, and now it's done.

The tech that played peek-a-boobie with me made me laugh. Seriously, she was standing there with my boob in her hand, and she asked me if I had implants. Ahem. A little honesty here? They aren't that big, and they certainly don't give the impression that anyone has made a financial investment toward improving them. They just don't. So I lied. I said, "Yes. Yes I do have implants. I bought the really expensive and realistic ones that let your breasts roll into your armpits and/or drop to your knees the minute you whip the underwire off." I think I made her day.

And the rest of you? Can totally make my day by doing two things.

1. Pick up your phone and schedule yourself a good old-fashioned hooter honkin’ mammogram RIGHT NOW, and then keep the appointment. Also, if you're worried about the cost, there are probably a couple of free breast screening opportunities in your area in October since it's Breast Cancer Awareness Month and all. Make some phone calls, you hear me? It's important.


And, no, this is not the kind of free mammogram I'm talking about at all. In fact, I am pretty sure this is Otin. Don't fall for this. (Otin, don't trick the girls this year, okay love?)

2. Humor my inner child and leave me comments with some slang words for breasts, mammograms, and/or bras because that kind of stuff really amuses me. I’ll pick out the funniest ones and send the winner a duffel bag full of dog hair. (But you’ll totally have to send me your own duffel bag, which I will gladly fill FOR FREE with only the softest and highest-quality dog hair that money can buy.)

WHO WILL BE THE BIG WINNER?!!

I’ll start you off with a few words –

Yabbos
Boobage
Gedoinkers

I AM SOOOOO IMMATURE!!!



**Our friend Diane, the owner of the other half of my brain, is participating in the Breast Cancer Walk in Washington DC in just two short weeks. Are you ready, Diane? ‘Cause I heard it’s going to snow. Heh. If anyone wants to make a last minute donation toward Diane’s goal, click on the pink ribbon icon in my sidebar right over there <= and make her day.