Dear Starbucks,I just wanted to drop you a quick note to let you know how much I appreciated the free coffee this morning. I know you felt it was something you had to do since you made me wait about five frickin’ hours for a large, black coffee. Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot. In your language, that would be a venti bold black, with room. I’ll try to be more respectful of your chosen language.
I don’t mean to sound ungrateful or anything, but next time you make me wait five frickin’ hours for a venti bold black, with room, could you maybe give me something else for free in addition to the $2.27 coffee? How 'bout a nice muffin with that? Or maybe you could save making me wait five frickin’ hours for the days that I order a $32 item, like a venti triple-shot, Mocha-Jamocha-Bananarama-Ding-Ding with whipped cream and a cinnamon sprinkle.
Thanks,
blognut
PS Maybe you could install a gas pump in your drive-thru, too? That would really save me the stress of watching my gas gauge drop to nothing while I wait five frickin’ hours for my coffee.
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23 comments:
Those heartless Starbuckers...they could have given you a nice cranberry crumble muffin!
I can’t believe you waited, even if you exaggerated a tiny bit. I get antsy if I have to wait five minutes.
You left your engine running for five hours? Now that's your mistake. Worried about a flat battery?! Me too.
I hate when that happens. A free muffin was the least they could do!
Sheesh!
Hugs
SueAnn
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I'm sending this to Starbucks requesting that they add a venti triple-shot, Mocha-Jamocha-Bananarama-Ding-Ding with whipped cream and a cinnamon sprinkle to their menu.
This is why I don't "do" Starbucks. I have a great latte stand about 5 minutes from my house that I hit every morning (no, not literally). They know me so well, half the time my coffee is ready before I even get to the window.
sigh
I love them.
:)
If you are ordering a venti bold black, why would you want room?
Starbucks is evil.
Aw, poor little Starbuck's. You're picking on him when he only had your figure in mind. You know how fattening those muffins are, doncha? See? They are wonderfully considerate.
The thing that bugs me about Starbucks is that I don't even like their coffee. How did they get to be Top Coffee Shop?! Their muffins are nice, though...
Bananarama Ding Ding. Heh. I have to remember that, use it later, and pretend I thought of it.
LORNA, I'd way rather have the chocolate chip or blueberry muffin? Can I pick?
SOUTHPAW, I may exaggerate a bit, but not much. ;)
MO, The batter charges itself off of the alternator as long as the car is running. Doesn't it? I dunno.
SLOMMLER, Agreed!
SCHMUTZIE, Thanks!!!
SAN DIEGO MOMMA, You mean it isn't already there? I must've dreamed that.
TERA, I might love them, too.
WANDA, So it doesn't slop all over the car while I'm driving!! :)
FRAGRANT LIAR, My figure? Is round. I think I can have a muffin if I want one. :)
RACHEL, There's nothing quite like a nice muffin to make up for everything that is wrong in the world.
CHERI, Heh. Do it.
Isn't free in starbucks lingo called a venti gratis with room?
Bastards.. they should just have a gas pump and a coffee pump.. 2 birds one stone. OH wait.. bad idea.. some idiot (such as myself) might get them mixed up. Then I could sue.. hmmmmmmmmmmmm not a bad idea after all!
Mmmmmm, Starbucks. The closest one to me is a 15 minute drive. It's unlawful!
Blognut! BE NICE TO STARBUCKS!!! What if they take away that dark cherry mocha?? shhh...don't upset them!
If you were going to wait 5 hours anyway, you should have ordered that shit. You were right! That shit is GOOD!
IDGTM, Yeah, I think so.
DIZZ, Totally! You? Are a genius!
FROGS, I don't know how you people live.
MICHEL, Heh! Told ya' so!
Sadly, I love Starbucks. But on an upnote, mine is located directly across the street from Paramount Studios and there's always a crowd so they can't make anyone wait or else HOLLYWOOD WOULD CLOSE DOWN.
That might not be such a bad idea though.
Baby, you are hardcore. I've known junkies who would say "screw the heroin, let's just go out for pizza instead" before they'd waited half that long.
Starbucks has proven to be a venti pain in my ass on numerous occasions. Yet I continue to go back with my pride up my own ass looking to quench my addiction.
Love your blog
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I think it's only fair they provide a television too... to help you pass the time :0)
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